Fashion Victims: Who's REALLY to blame?

Last night, the girls and I went out for drinks. As we're mingling, I couldn't help but notice a few offenses...

To the man with the tight red button down shirt:
Tight shirts might be alright during the day, but you shouldn't wear a shirt to the club that is tighter any female in attendance.
P.S. Don't think I didn't catch the shoes. White shoes after Labor Day -----> OK / White shoes after snowfall-----> One Exception: Santa

To the two guys dressed alike:
Perhaps dressing identically is cute for 13 year old girls with colored braces in Hannah Montana t-shirts, but for grown men it's a bit disturbing. Did you get dressed together? All I could wonder was who proposed the idea and who seconded it (I wanted to know who to "open fist punch" first).

To the girl in the sweater dress:
Many clothes were designed without you in mind. Just because it's made in your size, doesn't mean it should be purchased. Perhaps an investment in Spanx or a girdle is near, it'll be the BEST ten bucks your ever spend (promise)!

To the girl in the gold dress (friend Sweater Dress):
Potato sack race anyone? Your dress was cute outside it having no shape whatsoever, all you needed was Idaho Potato stamp on the front.

I don't claim to be a fashion guru, but these people were in violation. I've concluded that society can no longer blame the "Fashion Victim". "The Victim" clearly thinks the outfit is acceptable. We have to start holding "the Victim's" friends (who don't say anything) accountable. They are accessories to the crime and should be charged.

Real friends don't let bad outfits happen to good people.

When in doubt, a friend is your best mirror. There is a VERY thin line between Avant Garde and Fashion Faux Pas...unless you are a trained professional just avoid these areas altogether.

Last BUT Not Least...
To the girl acting out the ENTIRE "Single Ladies" video:
In public, it's acceptable to do small hand gestures or moving of the feet from videos. What's not acceptable it acting out the entire video in the middle of a club. We all love the song too, but those dances should only be done on a space/talent available basis.

143 (Your REAL Friend) Miss Boston

Read More

You Just Had 2B There

This is the first installment of many Had To Be There's. I hear (and say) some of the most random things you'll probably come across...I've taken the best parts of the most bizarre conversations for you to chuckle at. With every one you read, you might laugh or you might not, but at the end of reading you'll really wish you were there!

• So I took an ice cream scoop of pot...


• TN: Is there anything else you wanted to put in this envelope.
  Yee: No, I left my anthrax at home today.


• BDL: And when there's a nuclear war all the roaches will come out and...
  Me: Be like "Yea bitches! Survival of the fittest!"


• BDL: If there was once thing that I could take away and you'd be angry, what would it be?
  Me: That rubber band ball BDL: I was gonna say your innocence.


• You were a tough cookie to crack but once I did you were all ooey gooey sweet inside.


• I don't know what it is...but I put it in my mouth.


• Me: He got punched in the face, he deserves to be mad.
  Yee: They came to fisticuffs.


• Hooking is where I draw the line. I can't be sitting in class thinking about who I have screw to pay for it.


• I told you...I'm headed to the pole.


• I liked it too...'til I got suspended.


• Me: This is going to be inappropriate and a bit sexual, but touch this :::as I force her to grab my boob::: it's my new bra.
  Yee: Um there's a window right there!
  Me: Oh, damn I forgot about the window.


• Random Student Caller (near tears): I have a registration question. I'm so confused about my schedule. It says MWR what does this mean?
  Me: Monday Wednesday Thursday


• These people find so much power between the chair and keyboard.


• I bet you would look good in green with all of your chocolate goodness coming out.


• Big Daddy L: Now I have to worry about you busting a cap on me.
  Me: You always had to worry it's just now you know.
  BDL: Well...that's how my bitches roll.


• I sat in the wrong part of the chair, I'm not sure I can have babies now.


• Some people get uncomfortable with the off-color stuff. The squirm is fun.


• Me: What if I was smelling and wasn't breathing thru my nose?
  Him: Where else would you breathe?
  (We're both idiots.)


• That kid is as dumb as a rock. He's like a real cool kid, but he's Old School stupid.


• Lesson of the Day: Caffine and exercise do not mix unless you want an instant laxative.


• This is too much drama for a non-relationship relationship.


• I can't even lie, I'm really messed up. I see like 3 or 4 of her.


• Gotta think economically, do I want one shot for $9 or 4 shots and some juice for the same price?


• I wear headbands to help keep my thoughts together.


• Me: Oh is it gonna tug at my heart strings?
  Yee: Probably not since your an unfeeling B-I.


• I swear these people get their rocks off by being mean, so whenever they are it's like an orgasm.


• We're in a recession. I'm about to lick the liquor off the ice in my cup.


• I dream of her at night covered in gravy.


• Are we gonna run on these walks?
  
• I can feel my eyesockets.


• Shut your eyes and you can feel your head.


• TN: Don't you know you catch more bees with honey?
  Me: Well, you catch more flies with bullshit.


• I wish I would see a thug with a scarf on, I'll tickle the hell outta him.
  
• I was undertaken by the influence unexpectedly.


• Kevin: I own a horse. My cousin trains them to race.
  Me: Oh like dog racing?
  Him: Yea...except horses.


• Everytime I put my feet into my sneaks they're so comfortable it feels like my toes are having an orgasm.


• TN: These people are crazy! What's wrong with them?
  Me: Now I see why people bring guns to work, they solve everything.


• I have 4 boys in my life...and I think 2 is my max.


• I need more than 2 words. He coulda kept them.


• If I were in a 3rd world country...this would be where I got a food ration.
  
• This is all shades of f-d up.


• We're like a fat girl in spandex...we know we shouldn't do it, but just can't help ourselves.

Read More